Do you know or have you known jigodis (of both genders)? I am convinced. There are individuals among us who behave badly. They are good for villains based on a darker personality in those favorable social circumstances or that highlight the darkness of the personality.



A social context sought with predilection by "hard core" scoundrels is politics. Here we can find «villainy» in great concentration. Corporations and military structures are another. The position of head or manager in an organization or institution is a particularly attractive place for them. And generally, wherever there is room to climb up through some social hierarchy, we are met with villainy and villainy. 

Indeed, power corrupts the human mind, they say in the village, and complete with the specification "with the condition of a dark shadow." And those currently in high public office are honoring us because we apparently prayed to the wrong relics. Who should I remember? How did the mayor of the capital want to take advantage of the moment of association with Simona Halep, a person of great reputation obtained through real work?

I want to comment on your reaction to the booing, but it would be a waste of time. The comment can be reduced to one word:  vanity  . It is a capital sin according to Christian dogma that the self-imagined "goddess" embraces, moreover, with all her heart despite the donations to the servants of God.

Vanity is an aspect of personality that probably every scoundrel suffers from. People who act badly are often opaque to their meanness and how it affects other people. Furthermore, a jigodie  is always  convinced that another is the villain and relentlessly accuses him of being a villain, according to the formula: "You are the villain, I am an innocent victim!"

The "essential" villain (there is also an "occasional" villain) does not suffer from confusion and does not doubt himself. While he is  immaculate  of divine purity, another is terribly miserable! He doesn't usually admit that he may be wrong, and if he does, I assure you, it's in his own interest. He has something to gain.

The villainous personality can be detected based on intuition combined with observation. Even simpler, you can feel it on your skin and compare it to a decent person. A person is  consistently  mean or nasty to you, and it's not just your interpretation of a fragile soul. Other people, fellow sufferers, declare the same. Whenever a person induces you through his interpersonal style to anxious, guilty, devaluing and devitalizing states or, metaphorically, you end up feeling "garbage" or "object" in the interaction with him, then you can be almost sure that this person will behaves meanly. Here you have? Did you recognize yourself? That gives sincerity!

The first thing you can do is ask yourself if you have been mean to that person. I assure you that a decent man, endowed with empathy and sensitivity, does exactly that. Instead, the quintessential villain, as I wrote in a previous article, has no such qualms or concerns. He acts bad and remains opaque to his impact on other people, also if you get his attention, he becomes even more hostile and blames you. His conduct is incorrigible. This is the type of scoundrel with potentially destructive potential for a community.

It is not necessary to have a degree in psychology to notice ugliness or meanness, it is even contraindicated. Many times, psychological knowledge, but of poor quality, can obscure one's own intuition. I know people trained in psychology, it is true that they are younger, who do not discriminate between villainous acts and decent acts until they meet one or two villains to compare with one or two decent people.

It seems that experience is the best teacher. It's only after a bit of experience with the villains that we get to see them for what they are. In fact, this is also shown by some psychological studies that highlight the phenomenon of  "blindness to villainy"  . Blindness occurs gradually through  habituation and delusional justification, like "he's not that bad, he actually smiled at me" or "he's not a bad person, he's stressed too". As far as habituation goes, if she finds an unpleasant odor, she will develop a tolerance to it as she becomes attached to it. And soon you will no longer feel it like the citizens of the southwest of the capital who no longer even feel the sulfurous stench of neglected garbage cans. The same with villainy, also an unpleasant smell but on a psychological level.

Professor Robert Sutton of  Stanford University  reveals in his book  "The Asshole Survival Guide"  the ten biggest lies people tell themselves. For what purpose? To excuse the problematic situation (at work, as a couple, on vacation) in which you continue to remain:

  1. Negation of the present or "It's not so bad." In fact, the situation is ugly and you think that you live in a paradise.
  2. Imaginary improvements: "Come on, it's better." Obviously, we have  illusions  ; the situation is bad, even worse.
  3. False hopes: "Things will get better." You can still hope that you are just an optimist. But tomorrow better than today has not arrived. Do you have good reason to believe that it will arrive?
  4. "Just a little more and I'll look for something better." You keep waiting for the right day, you postpone the decision and imagine a day tomorrow that will change your life. You can wait a long time and well. The desired tomorrow never comes.
  5. It makes me suffer, and that strengthens me: "It's worth it, because it's a lesson that I ride on, being a better person." Deserve? Who says that suffering hardens you? Christian dogma or reincarnation story? Have you thought it could be a children's bedtime story with DC? How much freedom did people have in those days? Yes, almost no freedom, so they needed a justification to stay somewhat sane.
  6. The savior complex: “I can make things work. I am irreplaceable." If so, why is the situation bad to begin with? Have you no power to fix circumstances? Do we have any possibility (besides the demonstrations) to fix something of the bad situation in the governability of this country?
  7. The power complex: “I am not a weak person. Of course it is bad. But I am strong and it does not affect me. Let's see if you repeat this mantra daily, does it help you? What do others around you think? And if you have a strong personality, how come every day you are worried, depressed and unhappy that you want to take your wife to the plains or want to kill your life partner?
  8. “I can pause and resume whenever I want” or “It's wrong, but I can separate my professional life from my personal life and vice versa. I can keep them separate and it won't affect my kids or my partner." Oh really? Do you think you operate like a robot? You give orders and that's it?
  9. Just Suffering: It's bad for me, but it's much worse for others. I have no right to complain." Anything can be bad at any time. Making a martyr is no excuse for being in a terrible situation.
  10. When you avoid falling from the lake into the well: "It's bad here, but I'm afraid it could be worse elsewhere." In fact, there are no perfect places. And some can be even worse. However, have you checked out the alternatives?